# Tales from the LFS - the other side.



## yellow

In responce to the other thread Tales from the LFS  , I have decided to add my point of view as a petshop emloyee. I'm sure there are other people out there like me who can add their own tales.
In the past few monthes i have had a guy come up to me to ask how long the plastic around the foams in his fiter take to dissolve as he had his for 3 monthes and it still there. Somehow he had assumed it would dissolve in the tank like the little detergent packages you can get for your dishwasher. 
I had another guy complaining how his fish were dying and his tank was gone green even though he had a top of the range filter ( Eheim 2060) on a 3 foot tank with only 6 or 7 fish. He even had a UV light system on it. After nearly 15 minutes of going through everything i could think of - He did proper water changes, proper light levels, not too much food etc. It turns out he only turned on the filter for 2 or 3 hours daily because he liked the sound of moving water but wanted to save money on electricity. he also wasn't using the UVC as a friend who breeds fish ( goldfish in his pond ) said that they cause algae :-? 
There was also the guy who kept guppies in a unheated tank in the front room so assumed they would also live in his pond and then complained that they had died so it must be our fault. We live in Ireland, its not noted for our sunny weather.
The lady who wanted some new fish for her tank, i asked what she had- angelfish and neons but she warned she wanted no cichlids as she knew they were trouble and she knew a lot about fish. So of course i told her that an angelfish is a cichlid to which she told me ' I know you are new here but you really should try to learn more about fish '. I really felt like selling her the krib pair she was admiring :wink: but instead handed her a book titled Cichlids and told her the page number for angelfish. 
The mother and daughter who complained there tank was full of algae , turned out they were living the light on 24/7. I explained the problem -too much light- and what to do -no lights for a week , if they could cover the glass totally it would help and then only 8 or 10 hours of light a day and the rest dark. Two weeks later they are back complaining tank was still green. Turns out they were turning on the light from midnight to 8am and the tank was in a bright room. They really couldn't understand why i was laughing and why my boss was laughing.

The last one is my favourite as they were such an angry pair and acting like know-it-alls. First they thought it was our fault as there was 2 different types of light bulb on the tank. Sunlite and Daylite and they had read online that you shouldn't mix bulbs. I pointed out that you could also find articles online saying Elvis was alive. They hide from me now and sneak in to get food and stuff without talking to me. That was my first and only time i openly laughed at someone for being stupid but i just had to.


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## Number6

awesome topic! 
Awesome laughs!

Any other LFS employees have some fun stories? Keep em coming...


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## Barbie

Ugh. I shouldn't play this game but here goes!

Saturday I had a lady in with her three screaming, running children. She had called before she came in, asking for "cichlids". I told her that she'd want to narrow it down, were they africans, south american, what size, what types... She said she'd just come in and look around. When she got to the store, her one child immediately charged up the back stairs into the glass gallery upstairs. The one that specifically says it's not open and has a fence across the stairs! She just stood there! I said "uh, it's not ok for him to just run around in the glass studio, go get him!" She brought him downstairs and just turned him loose again.

She's telling me how she paid someone to come clean her tank and then most of her fish died, so she tore it apart two weeks ago and cleaned it herself. THEN she went and bought some new cichlids. She showed me a picture of two of her new fish, they were Red Devils. I told her that I didn't have any fish for sale that had a chance of living long term in that uncycled 55 gallon tank with those fish, but I'd be happy to test her water and give her a bag of bacteria from my filters in the back to help jumpstart her tank again, if she'd like. She got all disgusted and said "you mean you won't sell me any fish? Won't these fish do fine? (pointing at the discus tank!)" About that time I hear splashing and turn in terror to see her child splashing his way through my 125 gallon Saltwater fish tank. The one with 4 Venomous Rabbitfish in it! She grabs him by the arm, no kidding, doesn't even apologize, just smiles and says, "He's autistic", like it makes it ok to just turn him loose with all of that stimulus or something.

Same day, a guy comes in asking me if I'm familiar with Biorb tanks. He's bought the "upgrade" size of 8 gallons and he wants to fill it up. It says he doesn't need to gravel vac, you just twist out the cartridge and replace it and do a 25% water change every 6 weeks... He's memorized the information packet that came with the stupid thing and I quite honestly wasn't sure I was going to have enough patience to get through explaining WHY that thing would misrepresent some of the facts in order to get people to buy the little death traps in the first place!

That's just the two frustrating stories from one day. I'll try to not post too many at a time .

Barbie


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## yellow

Cheers Barbie, 
Kids out of control - bring on the pirahna tank.


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## Dewdrop

I'm enjoying both threads :thumb: I've had some experiences with dumb LFS employees but can understand the frustration a knowlegeable one can have with John Q. Public too lol.


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## bma57

yellow said:


> Cheers Barbie,
> Kids out of control - bring on the pirahna tank.


Or electric eel! :wink:


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## secrest

I have a feeling this will be the more entertaining thread. Off to a great start so far!


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## Laurel

I hate people that let their kids run loose and then have some sort of sense of entitlement like just because they do/did a bad job parenting, you need to deal with it. The justification is always the same too. "They're XX years, old, what do you expect?" "I expect you to have control of your XX year old, if you can't take them out into public without having problems, don't." :roll:

I clearly remember that when I was a kid, stores were look and don't touch, and you stayed right near your parents regardless of how boring the conversation was.


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## Nathan43

Thats because parents can't spank their kids anymore :lol: 
I personally liked the sign a lfs in Tampa FL had which said. (IF you stick your hand in the tank, they are not responsible and you must purchase the whole setup. It was a 210-300 gallon with 3 2ft pacus. One was 28 years old and was enormous, unsure of exact size.
Anyway, funny stuff.


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## barbarian206

i love this thread its great to hear from both sides now thats reality tv we have autistic kids here in nyc but the diffrence is most parents here put body harness on the so they dont get in to trouble. thats why i cant work with people cause i would of let him get stung .sorry to say but i love kids but most parents dont .


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## cichlidsrextreme

lol this is great i love hearing stupid stuff ppl say expecially when they thing they know something maybe i should consider my first job in the pet store its lps not a large chair love it there but i would lol at stuff and get really angry at the kids that tap on the tank and i remember it being boring when i was little but i tell you my parents whipped my a** if i did something like that lol they be like call the law idc im gonna beat him


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## cichlidaholic

I took my mother in law into a local chain store to let her pick out some basic "tropicals" for a tank we'd gotten her.

I swear to you, I turned my back for a second and she had her hand in a tank trying to catch her own fish.

Needless to say, she didn't do too well with the hobby and gave up in no time...

Thank goodness!

But I'm not sure who looked more horrified...Me, or the LFS employee who was trying to help us.


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## Guest

Every so often I help people at my LFS because their freshwater employees are idiots.

I've explained cycling to people and said they either don't want cycling because they don't want to see bacteria in the water, or they ask me if they'll be able to see it when it's colonized.

I've had a know it all guy insist that A. burtoni (labeled there as Haplochromis burtoni) insist it is in no way in the genus Astatotilapia and insisted they were only from Victoria, not Tanganyika.

People asked me if neon tetras could be kept with Piranhas when there is a goldfish bitten in half floating in the piranha tank...

Nothing else really funny, just people asking stupid or common sense questions and so on.

Oh, and I remember arguing with the LFS owner why asian RT catfish are not "wonderful fish" and why he should not insist on selling them to people with community tanks.

Now he's selling 2ft Alligator Gars... which get up to 8ft long I believe... :roll:

~Ed


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## bulldogg7

Great thread! Nice to hear things from the other side of the fence.


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## chapman76

When I worked at petsmart I'd always have people say "The box shows ....". Yup, it does. Anything else? Just because Eclipse has a 6g tank with 4 gouramis, 10 neons, and a couple of pictus cats, doesn't mean it's right thing to do.


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## Barbie

You'd be positively amazed how many phone calls I receive a week from people that bought stuff online that they're not smart enough to work. I've had customers that decided to upgrade their tank get pissy when after walking them through how to set up a sump (that they then bought somewhere else) and recommending which pump they'd need (which they then ordered somewhere else) and then they needed help setting up their CO2 reactor (that again, they didn't buy from me!) I finally told them I couldn't provide tech support for it. I told them how to figure it out, and where to look for the information, but that I wasn't going to be able to go give them the exact levels I'd recommend at this time. I have received two emails so far explaining what poor customer service it was of me to not figure it out for them. Evidently the $1500 they'd spent in my store guaranteed them rights to any information in my head for life, regardless of whether they actually got great fish and equipment for their buck, previously. Mind you, I DID answer the question, I just didn't go get the answer for them, I made them do some leg work of their own. Go figure, I'm so mean. Hopefully whoever they're using for information now can afford to be more available .

I had a guy yell at my answering machine on Sunday at 5 minutes to 5 (I had left to help a friend and my husband was minding the store for me). He needed me to tell him whether he should just order this Eclipse thing he'd found online to replace the POS Biorb he'd already purchased somewhere else.... Ummm, hello?

While I do realize customer service is really the only thing I can provide that people can't find elsewhere, I'm also the only store that routinely sedates and scrapes any sick fish and treats as aggressively as I can. I carefully walk people through the cycling process and figuring out where they want their tank to be when it's finished. I answer emails on days I'm "off" so I can solve problems, even if I'm not actually in the store and open for business. How much more should I be doing? This is the whole one woman show problem, and with 28 aquariums and 1600 gallons of water at home and 2600 gallons of water in the store, I really do run out of hours in my days to work myself to death in. Anyone have any suggestions for snappy lines I can paint on the walls of the store to help people better understand that?  So far the best suggestion I've read was "Tech support for online purchases can be found at http://www.google.com. but I think that might be too subtle for some people .

Barbie


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## iceblue

Your to be commended for your patience but I can understand your frustration. I was going to suggest making up brochures to help people properly set-up thier tanks but the paper would probably disapear quickly and create even more questions for them to rant about on the phone.

Maybe you could set up a board with links to websites that you feel are worthy of thier study or set up a class a couple of nights a month for a few hours to help educate your customers.

If you also run an aquarium maintenance service offer to take care of thier aquarium if thier not willing to put in the time to do it themselves. If they persist with questions that are involved and lengthy offer them the brochures, show them the links board and give them the dates you'll be running the class. I'm sure there are uncouth morons out that will feel like they are getting the brush off but those that are really interested in thier hobby and would be good customers for you and will see that you really do have thier best interests at heart. :thumb:


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## TheFishGuy

Fun Stuff! I used to keep large show tanks in the store I ran and kept common large growing fish in them (cichlids) so people could see just how big they would get....

Guy comes in and wants to buy an oscar, so I go through the usual line of questioning to get a better understanding of his experience with fish... To find out he has no experience... Before I could say anything he tells me

"I'll take a ten gallon and an oscar."

So of course I tell him he'll need atleast a 55 for an oscar and the tank will have to cycle. He looks at the baby oscars and says,

"You're joking right?"

I said,

"Oh no, here's a full grown oscar right here"

Guy: "that's not the same fish"

Me: "Yeah, hard to believe isn't it?"

Guy: "It's not even the same color!"

Me: "Well, you see, you looking at a red oscar and this here is a full grown common."

Guy: "So I was right, they are different fish!"

So I go grab a book, an oscar book and start to show him the different kinds of oscars and he finally says,

"Ok, well, I'll just buy the ten gallon and the oscar now, seeing as fish only grow to the size of the tank, I mean geeze, now wonder why that oscar got so big, that tank is huge!"

This is when I started laughing and insisted that if he want to buy an oscar to read the book first, then come back to get the oscar... He storms off saying he'll just go to the next town over and spend his money where they've got better customer service! :lol: I was just a high school zit faced kid back then, why would he listen to me?

So how many stories are we limited to on this thread? Cuz I've got tons.... :lol:


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## bulldogg7

Keep it coming!!!

I can't get the image of a square Oscar out of my mind. A square one the same size as a 10gal. Just think it'd make a cool photoshop project :lol:



> "The box shows ...."


 I remember seeing a box at wallyworld that had nearly 100 mixed cichlids in it, I think they changed the box since, I can't find a pic of it anywhere online now. Next time I'm there, I'll try and sneak a pic if they still have that tank.


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## Guest

Keep them coming TFG!


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## yellow

Today i had a guy come an and point at the 2 parrots we have and said I'll take the 2 of them and do you have a blue one. Slightly confused i said I don't think they them come in blue, are you sure this is what you want? i explained how big they got and could be aggresive. He tells me its fine they are going into a 3 foot tank with 2 others and insisted it was fine.

So fair enough its a shop in the end of the day and i sold him the fish. About 3 hours later he rings up to give out about the 2 fish have killed his other 2 goldfish. The poor man had confused th parrots for orandas and obviously hadn't been listening to me or read the sign saying Tropical or even seen the label.

He ended up coming back and swopping out the parrots and buying 5 orandas including a blue one


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## goldoccie21

like pollys pets in central texas stupid people and the live stock is painful to look at


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## swimming fish

the point is most people just don't want spend 200$ on the tank and equipment for a 5$ fish.


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## iceblue

swimming fish said:


> the point is most people just don't want spend 200$ on the tank and equipment for a 5$ fish.


Yea, that would be insane. :lol: .....................Should I call a Psychiatrist? :?


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## cichlidaholic

iceblue said:


> swimming fish said:
> 
> 
> 
> the point is most people just don't want spend 200$ on the tank and equipment for a 5$ fish.
> 
> 
> 
> Yea, that would be insane. :lol: .....................Should I call a Psychiatrist? :?
Click to expand...

No, you're in the right place, surrounded by people with the same affliction... :lol:


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## fishwolfe

i went to my wifes work and the lady next to her had a j.d. in a octagon "cup" on her desk.not even half a gallon of water.it was like a beta cube thing.when she showed up i had a semi polite talk with her.but she wouldn't let me buy it from her.my wife said it died about a week later.


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## JenTN

You guys make me feel better! I always feel like I am bugging the **** out of the people at the LFS's asking all sorts of questions! I take their word as God, lol, even though I did end up having to swap venustus out. DH laughed last night because we went to one LFS and the lady at the front said "hey girl, who's got your kids tonight?" My husband looked like we were nuts, then when we left he said "how many times a week are you in here?!" LOL

I will say I take my 2 year old and 6 year old in there, and my 6 year old knows the no-touch rule. My 2 year old can't really get it, so he is either detained in his stroller or I hold him. And oops I publicly spanked him in the LFS one time


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## Marshes

great thread. I work in IT so i can definetly sympathize with your pain


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## JenTN

cichlidaholic said:


> iceblue said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> swimming fish said:
> 
> 
> 
> the point is most people just don't want spend 200$ on the tank and equipment for a 5$ fish.
> 
> 
> 
> Yea, that would be insane. :lol: .....................Should I call a Psychiatrist? :?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> No, you're in the right place, surrounded by people with the same affliction... :lol:
Click to expand...

Thursday night I dragged hubby all over town looking for the last of my stock list (almost done, 2 more fish to go) and rocks to make caves. I was telling him how I needed another filter, and wanted to change the substrate to smaller rocks or sand. He looked at me and said "honey, do you realize how much money we've spent on freaking fish?" I said "well, I found a hobby I like, why don't you get one too?" He said he doesn't have time for a hobby, he's too busy working overtime to finance my fish addiction


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## cichlidaholic

JenTN, you may be better off with your husband remaining "a voice of reason"...

My husband is in as deep as I am, so no one has any control. Even the cat jumps up on the table to look into all incoming "bags" after we've been out for the day. :lol:


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## swimming fish

Sorry, when I said:"the point is most people just don't want spend 200$ on the tank and equipment for a 5$ fish." it doesn't mean I agree with them, too many times, I saw people keep 2 tiny golden fish in a 5 g glass bow, when I told them these two tiny fish need at least 20 g tank with a fiter.They point out the fish only cost 2$, why they need spend so much money on the tank.


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## Joels fish

There are people who have fish , and there are hobbiests. The two are not the same , and you know who's who by their attitude about their fish.


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## cichlidaholic

Joels fish said:


> There are people who have fish , and there are hobbiests. The two are not the same , and you know who's who by their attitude about their fish.


I couldn't have said it better! :thumb:


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## iceblue

swimming fish said:


> Sorry, when I said:"the point is most people just don't want spend 200$ on the tank and equipment for a 5$ fish." it doesn't mean I agree with them, too many times, I saw people keep 2 tiny golden fish in a 5 g glass bow, when I told them these two tiny fish need at least 20 g tank with a fiter.They point out the fish only cost 2$, why they need spend so much money on the tank.


My apologies to you Swimming Fish. I never meant to infer you would agree that it's OK to keep a fish in less then adequate conditions. I've always made the assumption that anyone who would care enough to join and participate in the Forum genuinely wants what's best for thier fish.

A common theme you'll find here at C-F is the length members will go through to make thier fish happy and it finds its way into inumerable threads in one form or another. Just the fact that we can have both sellers and buyers coming together for whats best for the hobby bodes well for all of us.

Again, my apologies, sometimes I just can't leave an open line alone. :wink:


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## fishandchips

Marshes said:


> great thread. I work in IT so i can definetly sympathize with your pain


I am in the same line of work. It is hard to explain something to someone who is not prepared to listen :roll:


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## cichlidaholic

Sometimes people only hear what they want to hear, even in threads on forums. There will be 10 replies advising against doing what they want to do, and one reply saying "go for it", and they will take that one as gospel. I've never worked in a LFS, but I'm sure this comes into play there, as well.

Sometime the knowledgeable LFS employee is fighting a losing battle, even before they open their mouths.

I deal with one great LFS in this area. All of the employees are well educated on cichlids, since they work for a manager that does the fall dive with Ad Konings in Africa every year. If you (as a customer) choose species you have been advised against putting in a tank, they will write *VOID* across your list, meaning the fish are not warrantied because you were told that it probably wouldn't work. I think that's a great idea, and if more LFS did that, it might discourage people from making mistakes.


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## NYjets51

This was a double post, sorry


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## NYjets51

This thread is a little bit old, but I saw it and all of the stupid people and kids running around reminds me of a lot of things, mainly my mom and dad (I'm in HS and i dont have a car, so they always drive me and come in with me to the pet store). One time me and my dad were in the lfs, and he saw the gigantic tank with pacus, some prehistoric catfish, and all those... So my dad decided to put his finger over the tank(with no lid), and what happens? The biggest fish in there jumps out and hits the water again. That one second of it out of water felt like 5 minutes. I can't imagine what would have happened if it hit the ground. And when I'm with my mom, im usually there to get mbuna (african cichlids) for my 55 gallon tank, and she always says "well why cant you get these fish?" (pointing to an oscar, or giant iridescent shark, or sometimes discus), and of course the guy who works there hears this and tells her it would work with my mbuna.


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## NYjets51

oh yea, yellow, what part of ireland are you from? my dad is from ireland


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## yellow

Waterford, in the southeast.


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## dialicious

A few years back I had a woman come in and ask what type of food she should use to feed convict fry.
So we start going over some of the options. She just wanted something simple because her son had just *brought it home from school that day*. 
Confused, and a little concerned, I ask for more details.
Apparently one of the children in the 3rd grade class had brought in convict fry in plastic baggies for all his classmates. They came with a little label saying that they can be kept in an unheated, unfiltered fishbowl or vase and only needed the water changed once a week.
That was it. No other information.

Common, everyone knows that (minimal) betta care is _exactly_ the same as convicts!

It made me pretty sad. I had nightmares about 25 little convict fry gasping weakly in wineglasses filled with chlorinated water.

My old shop is an independent store downtown - so we'd get the first of the month welfare check rush, as well as multi thousand dollar saltwater customers. The diversity was amazing... and frustrating.


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## wsa88

Laurel said:


> I hate people that let their kids run loose and then have some sort of sense of entitlement like just because they do/did a bad job parenting, you need to deal with it. The justification is always the same too. "They're XX years, old, what do you expect?" "I expect you to have control of your XX year old, if you can't take them out into public without having problems, don't." :roll:
> 
> I clearly remember that when I was a kid, stores were look and don't touch, and you stayed right near your parents regardless of how boring the conversation was.


I have a story about that. I work at a fish store as well. Anyway a few months ago this lady comes into the store with her two young girls. One of the girls has some pebbles in her hand. She walks over to our 178 bow front saltwater reef tank (valued about $15000) takes the pebbles and starts banging on the glass with them. I ask her to please stop to which her mother does nothing at all but pull her hand away from the tank. Then they walk around to some more tanks and the little girl does it again. My manager yells at them "Please don't bang on the tank", to which the mother replies "I already told her once don't embarrass her in front everyone". Embarrass her she like 3 years old how about you take some control of your kid lady. If I did some s**t like that when I was younger my ass would be grass and my mom would be the lawnmower. I have another one. This lady comes in and I can smell the alcohol on her. She goes the African cichlids section of our store. I greet her and she says that she wants one of these fish (sorry don't remember exactly what it was). I went through the usual thing that I do with people blah blah blah. Anyway I catch the fish she wanted for her and put it in the viewer ( the plastic thing you put fish in when you catch them, thats what I call it). Before I go and put in it a bag for her she asked if she could pet the fish to which myself and another employee did the double take. I had to hold back laughing I said excuse me and she repeated it again. Next thing I know there she is putting her finger in the viewer trying to pet this fish. Funniest thing I've ever seen. Oh I have soooooooo many stories. My fav is the one well I'll get a bigger tank, or the I have 20 fish in my 10 gallon tank. And why do they keep dying.


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## Nathan43

Yeah, just talking to my friends infuriates me. One gal looked into my tank (8" red devil with fry) and said, "What kind of gold fish is this?" 
I say "What?"
She replies "Is it like the ones at the zoo? I want to feed it."
After laughing a bit, I reply "Sure, hold this pellet in your hand and stick your hand in there."
Needless to say, she was not pleased and I cleaned up about a half gallon of water off the floor, but it was worth it. :lol:


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## kingpoiuy

Good one *Nathan43* ! :thumb:


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## TheFishGuy

Speaking of midas/ red devils... I just got back from the Toledo zoo where it seems as if they're over run with them :lol: I'll pop up a couple of videos to show you in the next couple of days.... :lol:


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## fishwolfe

today i bought a 1"-1.5" male joanjohnsonae and a 3" polystigma.as i was being rung up by a different person than the guy who help me with the fish ,i asked if these 2 would be good in a 10g tank.any ideas what the response was?thats right,"no problem,they will be fine".i just laughed too myself.and this from the best lfs in portland.


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## ashilli48

Nathan43 said:


> Thats because parents can't spank their kids anymore :lol:
> I personally liked the sign a lfs in Tampa FL had which said. (IF you stick your hand in the tank, they are not responsible and you must purchase the whole setup. It was a 210-300 gallon with 3 2ft pacus. One was 28 years old and was enormous, unsure of exact size.
> Anyway, funny stuff.


That would be Fish World and Miss Cathy is serious! They had an incident where $700 worth of fish were killed by a kid that put some kind of soap or detergent in. She called the Tampa PD out to "explain" to the customer what they did wrong.


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## bulldogg7

Did she win the case? opcorn: opcorn: opcorn:


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## exasperatus2002

One thing that irked me alot was how people would come into the store. lay out $3-$400 and a new system with bells & whistles and they never would include a book or magazine on how to care for what they're buying. I even went to the extent of writing my own general articles on some of the stuff and people didnt want it. Come on, reading is fundamental. One guy says he doesnt need it, thats what I was for. Then theres the little kids, 6-7 yrs old that would have to translate for the parents on why their pet is half dead & why its their fault. Kids at that age dont have all the words to speak it in their own language let alone in two. I had my fair share of kids beating on tanks and sticking fingers where they dont belong & getting biten because they were dumb (again reading is fundamental, heres your sign). My favorite was a pair of sisters who'd lock themselves in the dog crates while the parents were shopping. Never had to worry bout them, just the parents...lol. I guess it was a better spot then the closet back home. I had one boy that came in and was smacking the tanks around. He was warned by me once not to do it (there was signs on the tanks too) but he didnt listen. Then he literally straight punched a 45 gallon tank that we had larger fish in (tinfoil barbs, bichirs ect..). Fish were bouncing around, the tank, which was on a decorative metal stand, was swaying with the water on the linoleum floor. My manager (I was asst. manager) yell out YO!! what do you think you are doing! and the father had the nerve to get peeved at us for yelling at his brat.


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## exasperatus2002

One last one. My lfs closed up recently. It was a mom & pop store. So I got out the local yellow pages looking for a new one that knew something about african cichlids. I should have been forwarned since it was a center city address. this guy gets on the phone and I ask if they have a good selection of african cichlids because I was looking to set up a tanganyikan tank. He says ya we do. We's got some angels & mollies......


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## ashilli48

bulldogg7 said:


> Did she win the case? opcorn: opcorn: opcorn:


Oh yeah! That store has been in Tampa for going on 30 years now. There is a giant sign and the local PD back her up when someone does something stupid in her store. And believe me she is in a not so nice part of town and the weirdo's turn out. You should go to reviews and look up their website. There is a customer of hers that hangs out there literally everyday and frequently blogs about the other oddballs that visit. Hysterical.


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## bulldogg7

Looks like a great store, glad the cops back her up. 


> Kids at that age dont have all the words to speak it in their own language let alone in two.


 I'm just waiting for my 7yo to tell somebody, "you can't do that!", she's always helping me with WC's and even stripping females. She knows to behave in the LFS, I've never seen her tapping on on a tank or anything. I just have to watch out if they puppies, but the fish are safe.


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## exasperatus2002

bulldogg7 said:


> Looks like a great store, glad the cops back her up.
> 
> 
> 
> Kids at that age dont have all the words to speak it in their own language let alone in two.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm just waiting for my 7yo to tell somebody, "you can't do that!", she's always helping me with WC's and even stripping females. She knows to behave in the LFS, I've never seen her tapping on on a tank or anything. I just have to watch out if they puppies, but the fish are safe.
Click to expand...

Sounds like a great family you have. One time we were up to our necks in bad kids, we had one woman who's young daughter was very polite and stayed by her moms side. We thanked her infront of the other parents so they can hear. I never seen so many shameful faces in one spot before that. Most of them grabbed their kids so they wouldnt look bad.


----------



## addicted2cichlid

*** worked on and off at a place nearby my home when they need it... i dont know how some of u guys can do it, i dont have the paitience for ignorance and stupidity i guess...

i had a guy come in and he wanted to start a yellow lab community in his 3ft 30 gal he had just gotten from a neighbor or something.
so we went through the things he needed... i handed him some de-chlor... he said oh i dont need that, because his water doesnt have chlorine in it, i assured him that living in my town he sure does and the de-chlor is neccessary... he walked out while saying that i should be ashamed of trying to sell things to people they dont need.

i dont know why people think cycling is so crazy... they are like oh my god well i dont want bacteria in my tank water... i just pull an AC off the shelf and show them the words 'beneficial bacteria'. i swear its like im a moron but if the box says it then its kosher.

im not even touching the oscar and a 20 gallon... too many stories, but peoples faces are hilarious when u refuse to sell them a fish. i know *** ruined some peoples days.

does anyone else get asked "why the fish in with my turtle keep getting eaten"?

a few of my fave quotes:

"i have 4 jack dempseys in a 20 gallon tank and they are fighting..."

"does the tank really need a filter, because the fish live in dirty conditions in the wild"

"can u eat goldfish"

ill put more up later i could go all night.


----------



## Barbie

What do you mean blacktip sharks (cats) are brackish? They get HOW big? They eat other fish? They said he'd be fine in our "community" tank. We have a pictus, a raphael, and 2 plecos in our 100 gallon tank. Where do you think our danios are disappearing to?

"Can I keep discus with yellow labs?"

"You want me to dump that nasty water where? Why would I add bacteria on purpose, that makes no sense (no matter how many times I've just explained it!)."

"I've used UG filters for years. It's the big trend to talk people out of them but they work great. Cichlids won't be any different than any other fish with them..."

"Elephant nose need to be purchased in pairs, not groups. You don't know what you're talking about (yeah, because I've never had them chew the snot out of each other when there was less than 3 together in a tank, oh wait, yes, only every time it happened!)

My new favorite is the people that want a discount because I raise so many of the fish at home. The price is already cheaper than anywhere in town by quite a bit, but I was told that I didn't need to make as much on them if I raised them... Evidently there's no expenses involved in that, let alone $2500 bucks in overhead every month.

Honestly, I'd managed stores before this. I must have been insane. I really thought it would be different if the shop was MINE. I've only had to ask one customer not to come back, but it's been close a few times. One of my wholesalers told me that it's much like murder, the second one is easier :lol:. Yes, yes I DID make a mental note not to go visit that wholesaler, hehe.

Barbie


----------



## Nathan43

Not really a lfs story but similar. My g/f told me that a gal at her work wanted to buy my 5 gallon Hex for her son. They wanted to get a couple "fancy fin goldfish", a couple guppies, & a Koi. I suggested some smaller, cleaner fish, or maybe just some guppies with a small bristlenose or something. She said her son has to have at least a couple goldfish. So the next day I sent her a link to a 55 gallon =) and guess what her response was?
"Thats way too big!"


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## MidNightCowBoy

When I was right out of highschool I worked at a combo feed and fish store. I actually worked the feed portion, but when the (idiot) lady who owned the fish store wasn't there I would have to go in and work the fish store. This lady only cared about selling and didn't really know anything about fish herself.

One interesting guy comes in and wants 50 feeder goldfish. I scoop em out and put them in the little plastic container and am counting them as i pour them into a bag. Guy says to me "Don't count the fish! Cheryl (idiot owner of fish store) never counts them!" So somewhere around 50 I stop counting and call it good. Guy comes in next day, "Hey, my son counted those goldfish and there was less than 50 in there!" My response, "well weren't you the one who told me not to count them?"

Another time some old guy comes in, Cheryl had sold him a bunch of fish, including convicts, to put in a 10 gallon tank. He comes back 2 days later with a bag full of dead fish. So I point out the obvious such as those fish don't belong together or in a 10 gallon tank. "Well Cheryl said they would be fine." Then I ask him about his setup. "what do you mean? I told you it's a brand new 10 gallon tank." Turns out it is ONLY a 10 gallon tank. No heater, no filter, no airstone, no no nothing! So i explain that his water is too cold, is also basically toxic to the fish (of course he hadn't used anything to treat the water) and that there was also no way for the fish to breathe. At the breathe comment he lights up and says "No, my grandson takes a straw and blows bubbles into the water once every day!"

I truly feel sorry for fish that are sold to fish killing idiots.


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## dogofwar

"I truly feel sorry for fish that are sold to fish killing idiots."

Sadly, the vast majority of people who keep fish fall into this category, in my experience...

It's why arguments (on boards like this) about whether keeping an oscar in a 55g vs. a 75g is "torture" are so pointless.

I'd bet that the guy buying the goldfish feeds them to an oscar that's shoe-horned into a 29g and has hole in the head from living in filth and eating nothing but goldfish. And he'll be pissed when you don't give him $50 in credit when he brings you the deformed oscar with half of its head rotted away...because its tankmates a pacu (bought at Wal-Tard) and a bullhead (catfish caught in a river) have grown "too big" for the tank.


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## yellow

Today a guy asked me about our vats of live rock i explained where it came from and the advantages it has for a marine tank, basically in large amounts it replaces your external filter. I mentioned marine ,reef and sea water numerous times. At the end he asks me for 5 kiloes, about 110 euroes, fair enough, then he asks me for some plants, about 50 euroes.

So obviousally i assume he has a few tanks and ask about them not at all expecting him to tell me he plans to put them in a pond for his koi. I'm still thinking i should have said nothing and just sold him the whole lot.

I was so astounded by his stupidity i didn't even think to bring him out to our pond section. :roll:


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## exasperatus2002

Every time I hear "it'll only grow as big as the tank its in" is muttered from some fools mouth I cant help but to want to pick up a stick and beat him with it. While its true that a fish does exude some pheromones that help to limit the size of its competition can grow & itself to an extent, it doesnt mean its not going to grow big. At the local chinese restaurant they have this baby arrowana (its so cute) and a bunch of ugly bloody parrots in a 20 high. I've notice how the parrots are dissappearing and the arrowana is still growing. *** seen people try to keep an oscar in a 10 gallon thinking it'll stop but they feed him alot of goldfish because its cool. but then get rid of it at 6-8" because it wont stop growing. I have two theories on why people are dumb. one is my Dawinian theory & the other is Theological. I'll be going to Heck because of the latter one. But to avoid offending someone or the mods. pm me and I'll share.


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## blairo1

> one is my Dawinian theory & the other is Theological. I'll be going to Heck because of the latter one.


:lol:


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## exasperatus2002

*blairo1*

While they may seem wrong to say there is a ring of truth to them.

Darwinian theory-
Only part of humanity is evolving, the rest is just along for the free ride. Evolution uses disease & predators to weed out the sick and stupid so that only the best examples for that environment prosper. But as mankind has exterminated most of its predators and has developed cures/treatments for most fatal diseases, our evolution has slowed tremendously. Example, Steven Hawking, Einstein & Olympic athletes are good example of superior minds and bodies, which are good evolutionary traits for the human race. Compared to ghetto people who seem to have de-evolved.

Theological theory-
Weâ€™re inbred and itâ€™s Godâ€™s fault. Here is how it happened. God created Adam (single DNA base), & took from him, his ribs to create Eve (same genetic material). They procreated & populated the world (lots of inbreeding). Then came the great flood, which wiped out most of the population (thus greatly reducing the available breeding stock of an already inbred people) causing greater inbreeding to repopulate the world.


----------



## dogofwar

An alternate perspective on the future of mankind is depicted in the movie "Idiocracy":
http://www.amazon.com/Idiocracy/dp/B000LWBSDU


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## Joels fish

Having lived in South Carolina for a couple of years now I can safely tell you all that the future in that movie is here! If you doubt me, move to the South.


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## mccluggen

I saw a great sign on the best little LFS in the area. It says:

"This store is rated PG-13, children must be accompanied by an adult"


----------



## Joels fish

Yeah, but what do you do when the parents are half the problem?


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## Nathan43

Maybe someone could create a brain in a handicap chair with a slash through it???
joke of course :wink:


----------



## Barbie

I have always intended to put up a sign that says "Any children left unattended will be given a mountain dew and a convict cichlid" (a friends espresso shop has a sign that says ".... will be given a triple shot espresso and a puppy, lol)

Barbie


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## Nathan43

Quick walmart story from last night to prove once again that these parents have no idea. I was buying water conditioner after leaving th gym and as I was browsing, this kid (10 or 12) with his mom was walking from tank to tank banging with two hands on each tank. Half the fish were cowering in the corners. I told the kid that the sound they hear from him banging on the glass is like me clapping my hands right in front of his ear and that it hurts. It was then that the mother said and I am not making this up. "Fish can't hear anything, they don't have ears." 
After suffering a brain aneurism, I left just shaking my head uttering under my breath. "Just please don't buy any fish." Never in my life then right there did I feel that the fish in the walmart aquariums would be safer then in the customer's hands...


----------



## kingpoiuy

Nathan43 said:


> Never in my life then right there did I feel that the fish in the walmart aquariums would be safer then in the customer's hands...


Now THAT is amazing!


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## exasperatus2002

****** if you do ****** if you dont. poor fish.


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## dogofwar

Reason #2,956 not to buy ANYTHING at Wal-Mart... not even step foot in the place.


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## ashilli48

Here is a good one I heard Friday night from a buddy that runs a LFS in the Tampa area:

Customer comes in and insists on having this wild caught FW puffer. The owner explains that he is beyond mean and should only be kept alone. The customer continues to push explaining that he has multiple tanks and that he knows what he is doing. Eventually the owner relents.

2 weeks later the customer calls up to the shop absolutely livid! First of all the puffer eats this other fish that the customer threw in there with him. (told ya so!). Second the poor puffer is kept in a 29 in the guys daughter's bedroom. Well she puts her hand in the tank and, imagine that, the puffer bites her. She screams, jerks her hand out of the tank, water goes everywhere, poor puffer goes saling across the room.

And of course all of this is the owners fault. Maybe....if negligence is allowing just anyone in without an IQ test!

You will all be happy to know that the puffer is back at the shop busy stalking crayfish, etc.


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## fishwolfe

i love when stupidity is painful :lol:


----------



## Joels fish

> i love when stupidity is painful


 :lol: :lol: :thumb:


----------



## gordonrp

dogofwar said:


> An alternate perspective on the future of mankind is depicted in the movie "Idiocracy":
> http://www.amazon.com/Idiocracy/dp/B000LWBSDU


lol exactly, that movie is too true.

some clips for people who haven't seen it
http://media.putfile.com/First-10-minut ... acy-Clip-1
http://media.putfile.com/First-10-minut ... acy-Clip-2
http://media.putfile.com/First-10-minut ... acy-Clip-3
http://media.putfile.com/First-10-minut ... acy-Clip-4

keep the stories coming, too funny :lol: :thumb:


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## fishwolfe

i have to see that movie!i have been saying this for years.the first clip is very evident here in oregon :x .


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## crotalusfan

It has been a few years since I have worked at an lfs, but here is one I love. A man comes in and asks me how aggressive parrot fish are. I had worked there long enough to know that you NEVER, NEVER answer a customer's question!!! You must get more info first! I say, "It really depends. What size tank will they be going into?" He says. "A 55." I say, "Are there other fish in the tank now?" He says, "(2) 3 or 4 inch oscars, (1) 3 or 4 inch red devil, (1) 3 or 4 inch texas, (3) "assorted" africans (all at least 4 inches), and 1 convict.'       

:thumb: :thumb:

I calmly said something along the lines of "That tank is too small for just the red devil, and he's going to kill ALL of your fish." He says, "Actually there is a 6 or 7 inch managuensis, and he pretty much rules the tank." I said, "Nevermind. The managuensis is going to kill the red devil and everyone else."

I still had to sell him the 2 parrot fish he wanted, because my boss said so.

Also, I had a customer come in with an amazon red tail cat in a rubbermaid bucket on wheels. He wanted to donate this fish to us. The fish was at least 25". I told him I had no space for a fish that big. He then dumped his bucket into our indoor koi pond and left.


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## Mustang Boy

i wonder what size tank that cat was in before he brought it in and dumped it on your guys hands


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## fishwolfe

so what did you do with the cat?


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## Nathan43

crotalusfan said:


> It has been a few years since I have worked at an lfs, but here is one I love. A man comes in and asks me how aggressive parrot fish are. I had worked there long enough to know that you NEVER, NEVER answer a customer's question!!! You must get more info first! I say, "It really depends. What size tank will they be going into?" He says. "A 55." I say, "Are there other fish in the tank now?" He says, "(2) 3 or 4 inch oscars, (1) 3 or 4 inch red devil, (1) 3 or 4 inch texas, (3) "assorted" africans (all at least 4 inches), and 1 convict.'
> 
> :thumb: :thumb:
> 
> I calmly said something along the lines of "That tank is too small for just the red devil, and he's going to kill ALL of your fish." He says, "Actually there is a 6 or 7 inch managuensis, and he pretty much rules the tank." I said, "Nevermind. The managuensis is going to kill the red devil and everyone else."
> 
> I still had to sell him the 2 parrot fish he wanted, because my boss said so.
> 
> Also, I had a customer come in with an amazon red tail cat in a rubbermaid bucket on wheels. He wanted to donate this fish to us. The fish was at least 25". I told him I had no space for a fish that big. He then dumped his bucket into our indoor koi pond and left.


I can't count how many people like that I used to know. I was ignorent when I got my first tank (13 years old). This was before we had the internet like we do now and the LFS employees said half of what I had was okay :lol: . I once had a 4" oscar, 3" red devil, 2 africans, one convict, one firemouth, and a pirahna in a 20 gallon. I quickly learned my lesson


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## exasperatus2002

Nathan43 said:


> I can't count how many people like that I used to know. I was ignorent when I got my first tank (13 years old). This was before we had the internet like we do now and the LFS employees said half of what I had was okay :lol: . I once had a 4" oscar, 3" red devil, 2 africans, one convict, one firemouth, and a pirahna in a 20 gallon. I quickly learned my lesson


MMMmmmm......buffet line. :fish:


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## Nathan43

surprisingly, from what I can remember. The african dominated the tank until the pirahna was about 5" and then chunks started missing. Traded all the fish back to the store for 1 large firemouth and had him for about 2 years.
old times...


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## crotalusfan

> so what did you do with the cat?


I actually took it to another LFS. They had a huge display tank (I think 800 gallons?) with another large cat (Which they liked to feed feeder rats). He was still there and seemed happy when I moved a year later.


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## dogofwar

"He says. "A 55." I say, "Are there other fish in the tank now?" He says, "(2) 3 or 4 inch oscars, (1) 3 or 4 inch red devil, (1) 3 or 4 inch texas, (3) "assorted" africans (all at least 4 inches), and 1 convict."

Par for the course.

Just about the only people who *don't* have tanks overstockled like that are people on boards like this.


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## crotalusfan

I have an empty 10gal that has been outside for a while. Do you think a group of 6 or 7 oscars and 2 or 3 TSNs would be ok? If so what else could I put with them for dithers? Neons or maybe guppies? :lol:


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## Mustang Boy

idk maybe you should ask your LFS im pretty sure they will have some good idea to what to put in there but i would recommend some Giant Danios for dither fish


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## Nathan43

crotalusfan said:


> I have an empty 10gal that has been outside for a while. Do you think a group of 6 or 7 oscars and 2 or 3 TSNs would be ok? If so what else could I put with them for dithers? Neons or maybe guppies? :lol:


I had this for a signature that I thought was funny, lol.


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## fishwolfe

i have close to 30 mbuna red zebras and 16 peacocks in a 10g with no aggression.seriously. im not joking.


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## iceblue

fishwolfe said:


> i have close to 30 mbuna red zebras and 16 peacocks in a 10g with no aggression.seriously. im not joking.


I'ld say you still need a larger fry tank.


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## gordonrp

fishwolfe said:


> i have close to 30 mbuna red zebras and 16 peacocks in a 10g with no aggression.seriously. im not joking.


yeah, they're already dead :lol:


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## fishwolfe

nope  alive and well at the moment :thumb:


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## Mustang Boy

yea they are so tight in there they cant move enough to be aggressive


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## fishwolfe

:lol: 
actually the zebras are in the tumbler and the peacocks are just about done with their egg sacks and swimming around on their own 8)


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## lab911

I too work at a lfs. I love it when I get the customer who wants a few of my "Chick-lids". I know I am in a real treat when the person cannot even pronounce Cichlid right. Or when they want to purchase a rare "Allergy Eater."

I also love it when I am explaining the nitrogen cycle or why you should not mix Oscars with Guppies and the customer replies: "Honey, I have been keeping fish way before you were even born." Like that makes them some kind of expert!

Or how about this.......... A mother buying a fish just to "shut-up" her child. After I net out the perfect one (mother standing behind me the whole time saying that the one I keep catching is not the perfect one for her little darling) and explain what kind of care it needs, the mother replies, "Don't waste your time. It'll just die in a couple of days and we will be back for another one." I just want to catch her a dead one and say"Here, let me save you the trouble."


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## Big Vine

exasperatus2002 said:


> One time we were up to our necks in bad kids, we had one woman who's young daughter was very polite and stayed by her moms side. We thanked her infront of the other parents so they can hear. I never seen so many shameful faces in one spot before that. Most of them grabbed their kids so they wouldnt look bad.


Nice work! :thumb: :thumb:

Great stories, guys & gals! opcorn: 
BV


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## LooKsRshaDy

Funny stories guys keep em comming lol


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## addicted2cichlid

i had a real winner a couple weeks ago...

im in our saltwater section, a girl around 20 years old, TWENTY, is checking out the blue damsels... she was like oh only 4$! she turns to me and asks will they go good with my goldfish?

i said no they are saltwater fish, this is out saltwater aisle (i could understand the mistake for a beginner fish keeper)

she then goes "saltwater, as in?" i reply "saltwater, like the ocean" she gives me a look like im speaking russian to her.

this chick had no idea what saltwater was. i cannot tell u how hard it was for me to keep a straight face.

are people being raised in caves?


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## addicted2cichlid

lab911 said:


> Or how about this.......... A mother buying a fish just to "shut-up" her child. After I net out the perfect one (mother standing behind me the whole time saying that the one I keep catching is not the perfect one for her little darling) and explain what kind of care it needs, the mother replies, "Don't waste your time. It'll just die in a couple of days and we will be back for another one." I just want to catch her a dead one and say"Here, let me save you the trouble."


i HATE these people! i tell them to go to the toy store down the street, cant kill a toy. uh i cant even tell u how much i despise these customers!


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## addicted2cichlid

another question that really chaps my a$$:

"do fish have brains?"

i wish i could answer "well these ones do but i have brainless fish over here"

my fish have more brains than some customers.


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## DeadFishFloating

dogofwar said:


> Just about the only people who *don't* have tanks overstocked like that are people on boards like this.


Oh there are plenty of those people here too.


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## kornphlake

DeadFishFloating said:


> dogofwar said:
> 
> 
> 
> Just about the only people who *don't* have tanks overstocked like that are people on boards like this.
> 
> 
> 
> Oh there are plenty of those people here too.
Click to expand...

I'd say there are more overstocked tanks in the various forum member's tanks than in the average hobbist's tanks because the average hobbist will start out with 20 neon tetras in an un-cycled tank, 18 of those will die within a week so Joe fish keeper will go back to wal-mart to buy something that isn't diseased and comes home with a red belly pacu that eats the remaining two neons. Well that was fun to watch but the pacu is all alone in his 10g tank so Joe heads back to wal-mart for some of those interesting shrimp and an angelfish. The shrimp become another lunch for the pacu. At this point the tank still isn't cycled and hasn't had a single water change, the angel and pacu die from ammonia poisioning by the end of the second week. Now Joe fish keeper asks the girl at wal-mart what fish to buy and she suggests that gold fish are easy to keep, so 5 goldies get stuffed in a bag and dumped into the tank without even floating the bag. Within an hour two are dead from the shock of being moved from 68F water to 82F, two more die within a week from nitrite poisioning. One last goldfish survives the tail end of the cycle and continues to survive for a couple years in that 10 gallon aquarium with purple gravel, suffering in putrid water that has never been changed, the tank has filled with algae caused by the incandescent lamp that was never switched off, the poor goldfish can barely be seen through the algae, Joe hasn't fed the fish in months because he doesn't "remember" but he must be eating some of the algae there's no need to feed the fish at all, the aquarium is perfectly balanced. Joe aquarist's gold fish meets its fate when he is flushed down the toilet still alive because the tank was starting to stink too much and Joe didn't want to deal with cleaning it. The next weekend I buy a dirty, stinky 10G setup at Joe's yard sale for $4.


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## bac3492

I wont lie I had a few ignorant fish keeping experiences. Im 16 now and probably started when i was 8 or 9. Although i believe most people do have poor first experiences i believe that not everyone will admit it. I think what seperates the joe shmo with a fish tank and true hobbyists is that the hobbyist will give it another shot with proper tanks and equiptment. The hobbyist will go out and learn about the fish the are planning to keep and how to do it succesfully. Joe shmo on the other hand will go out and spend some money on fish that catch his eye and when they die, he will repeat the process.

My ignorant experiences are:
I had a 5 gallon tank when i was 8. i went to the shop and bought 5 danios but only one with hump backs. I called them my "special needs fish" I preformed probably 2 water changes in 1 1/2 years. When i did it, i used completely chlorinated water. Only 2 ended up surviving
I blame the LFS because at such a young age i believed they could do no wrong.

The other..... I tried keeping a trio of auratus in a 20 long. 2 1/2 feet. This was at about 11. The male killed both females and lived happily in there for a few years. I did preform water changes with the tank. He died just about a year ago. I decided on that tank over a book i had gotten for Christmas from my aunt. It told me that the auratus would grow to a max of 3 1/2 inches. The were aggressive but could be housed in a 2 1/2 foot tank. I burt the book at a bonfire about 1 1/2 years ago. Wish i could have remembered what it was called so that it could never be distributed again


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## Barbie

I needed to come add a new story to this thread. I just had a customer come in that wanted to add 4 little blue fish to her sw tank. As we talk, I discover the tank is a 90 gallon, and it's 2 months old. She already has 7 fish in it and wants to add more little ones BEFORE she starts adding the big ones....

When I asked her if she had brought in a water sample, she said no, she didn't need to, she just wanted fish. I told her that her tank is still relatively new for as many fish as are already in there and she immediately puckered her face up like I fed her a lemon or something. She told me I was negative the last time she was in also and she didn't appreciate it. When I replied that I was _trying_ to save her money and dead fish she told me all of her fish were small and I didn't know what I was talking about. Her husband walked through the door about then and she told him "She's already saying we have too many fish. Let's just go."

Customers like this make me really regret getting into this business. If I'd just bag her up what she wanted and let her kill the fish, I'd drive a much nicer car and not worry about how to pay my bills, whether I slept well at night or not. Hopefully someone that's a good hobbyist will buy her tank next summer when it's in her yard sale. Good lord are there some stupid people out there.

Barbie


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## bac3492

I find your stories very telling of your nobility. I really wish there were more people in the LFS business that would stretch their necks and wallets out for the better of the fish and for the customers (even if they dont appreciate it at the time). If the lfs employees in my area were interested in more than just selling me something, i would have not made so as many mistakes in fish keeping. It was a long time until i started to think to myself. Hmm, maybe this isnt a good idea? This cant be a good mix of fish.......

Now im too the point that i wont even visit and LFS unless i have good things about it. Your story does however make me think that there could me many good shops out there that get bad reviews because they refuse to sell the reviewer an oscar for his/her 10 gallon tank


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## addicted2cichlid

Barbie i know what u mean completely! i make 8.50 an hour (insert crying-broke smiley here), its all about commission, and no matter what, we are still a business so there is always a push on selling. however i cant even tell you how many sales *** shot down to keep fish alive and/or healthy.

my commission goes off of every 40 people i help (who buy something). and i have to meet certain total sale numbers for a percentage of my sales. somethign like $1000 sold gets me 
$25, selling 999$ gets me 0.

if i were to just nod my head, smile, and bag there fish, i wouldnt be driving a VW with a barely working trans, and i would have my 8ft 240gal.

im very good at talking and relating to people but i would never give someone something they didnt need or something i dont think would work out/survive. if i cant answer there question, ill straight up tell them i dont know (usually a saltwater question) and ill look it up on the net or find one of my more saltwater inclined co-workers.

the way i look at is this: if u tell people how to do everything right, be paitient when first starting a tank, and give them good info and hints, they will keep coming back to you. and if they are anything like me (MTS positive) then it should be lucrative for me, and fun for them.

could i make more money BS'ing people, yea probably double what i make now... but its just not how i roll.

its refreshing to hear there are others out there who care about it like i do!


----------



## blairo1

Wow, you get sales commission for selling fish in the States! Man, that's bad news, that shouldn't be allowed simply because it puts the priority on the sale and not on the circumstance or the health of the fish.

No wonder things are so bad.... :roll:

No-one should be put in that position when dealing with livestock - you're forced to choose between doing what is ethical, the result of which is being poorer and having your job at risk, or you do what is purely good for their business. Commission works well for a lot of things, don't get me wrong, but I don't think it should be happening like that, talk about backwards.


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## esob0i

bac3492 said:


> I find your stories very telling of your nobility. I really wish there were more people in the LFS business that would stretch their necks and wallets out for the better of the fish and for the customers (even if they dont appreciate it at the time). If the lfs employees in my area were interested in more than just selling me something, i would have not made so as many mistakes in fish keeping. It was a long time until i started to think to myself. Hmm, maybe this isnt a good idea? This cant be a good mix of fish.......
> 
> Now im too the point that i wont even visit and LFS unless i have good things about it. Your story does however make me think that there could me many good shops out there that get bad reviews because they refuse to sell the reviewer an oscar for his/her 10 gallon tank


i do that on a daily basis.. i hate when customers come in an ask for like 6 fish that are about 2+ inches an say they have a 5 gallon tank an i say you cant put those in there an then they say i already have 9 of those in there an i still have room... hate when they say that.... an do that.... i had this guy come in the store an ask whats a good food for a oscar soo i told him hikari gold an gold plus an i asked him what size is your tank an he said FIVE GALLONS!!!!!!!!!!! the first thing i told him was you NEED TO GET A BIGGER TANK no less then a 55 but even then i would say a 75 or bigger.... i hate working with fish at times.... then again i get some real nice customer that know what they are talking about an take my advice an improve on what they do.... an one more before i have to go to work haha this lady came in to buy some gold fish an i asked her how big her tank is and she said 29 gal so i said ehhh thats still small for a gold fish an you would atleast need a 4ft long tank (55) since they get big... an you would have to improve your water changes then she bust out i already have 9 in there.... i told her get a bigger tank an i wouldnt put any more fish in there.. so she walked off all pissed off .... people these days...


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## dwarfpike

I remember back when I worked at the LFS. It was great, and when people ask me why it was my favorite job despite being min. wage ... I always say, "It's becuase it was the only job where the customer wasn't right." Our asst. manager was very vocal in making sure our sales put the pet first. I miss the shocked looks on the faces of customers when you told them no. :lol:


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## ademb

very very interesting thread. we have a saying amongst my mates, u need a license to drive a car, but u dont need one to breed. Good to see its not just me thinking people are literally becoming stupider!!


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## cichlidiot75

A guy walks into a LFS. He asks for two young Sciaenochromis Ahli. Reason: "My mouse Botia killed all of my fish in my 16 Gallon tank, and I want him dead" A week later he brings back the Ahli's, the Botia terrified them single handedly. He flushed the Botia and bought some shellies.


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## cichlidiot75

addicted2cichlid said:


> if i were to just nod my head, smile, and bag there fish, i wouldnt be driving a VW with a barely working trans, and i would have my 8ft 240gal.
> 
> im very good at talking and relating to people but i would never give someone something they didnt need or something i dont think would work out/survive. if i cant answer there question, ill straight up tell them i dont know (usually a saltwater question) and ill look it up on the net or find one of my more saltwater inclined co-workers.
> 
> the way i look at is this: if u tell people how to do everything right, be paitient when first starting a tank, and give them good info and hints, they will keep coming back to you. and if they are anything like me (MTS positive) then it should be lucrative for me, and fun for them.
> 
> could i make more money BS'ing people, yea probably double what i make now... but its just not how i roll.
> 
> its refreshing to hear there are others out there who care about it like i do!


You're right. In the long run, with sales people, the "farmers" will do better than the "hunters" because some customers will come back hoping to see you still work there. I bought my first 15g in a great store, went there for my 29g and now a 63g plus every single fish and accesory. Because I can trust these people and they know what they're doing.


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## jonnyfish

Oh where to begin.... I have enough stories to make heads spin.

One of the most recent ones: Customer asks "Do you need anything special to start a saltwater tank?"

Walking the department I notice a customer looking into one of the cichlid tanks. I ask if she needs help with anything and she replies she would like to buy a fish. I notice she is holding a half gallon bowl. I ask if she is planning on keeping the cichlid she is looking at in the bowl. She replies of course! Is this not a good idea???

"What do you mean monthly water changes aren't enough?!?"

When a customer asks for a fish I always ask these questions: How big is their tank? What do they currently have in it? How long has the tank been up and running? Half the time I get the response "Well we are buying the tank right now." These people get furious when I try to educate them about fish and about the cycling process.

More to come. I get one horror story each day at work.


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## TNprogrammer

These stories really are great. They make me stop and think. A friend of mine and I have put some very serious thought into opening a fish store on my end of town. We had one for years, then the owner sold out to a pair of goofballs that literally barely knew how to set up an aquarium. The store closed about 1.5 years after that. We have a super nice lfs store on the south end of town, but it's quite a drive (about 30-35 minutes). With the stories I'm hearing, I'm wondering if I have the disposition to deal with some of these people  I get ticked off when I lose a fish while cycling a new aquarium, never mind selling a fish that I KNOW some idiot is going to terrorize or kill within a week.


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