# How do you convince better half you need a bigger tank?



## jpilone (Sep 18, 2012)

I went from a 5 gal goldfish tank, to a 36 gal bowfront with cichlids. Now I find myself wanting a bigger tank. Where the tank is now (on a very well built/sturdy/thick solid wood 48" x 18" buffet table thing).

When I wanted the 36, she was hesitant (more like resistant) to getting it. She saw it when I brought it home and said it was too big, but now she says it looks nice and likes it. (I actually saw her looking at the fish movement yesterday while we were on the couch!).

Not sure how to read her, but I'd love to upgrade to a rectangular 50 or 55 gallon that would fit perfecting on this table in the living room.

Have any of you been in this situation and had to convince your spouse or better half to let you?

I'd love some ways to convince her!

Or maybe I should get it and change it out one day while she's gone and say "look what I got!" 

opcorn:


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## metricliman (Sep 3, 2012)

Pretend the tank has a leak... Then say you need a bigger tank. Pretend to reseal the tank and then you have two tanks!


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## jpilone (Sep 18, 2012)

I don't have anyplace for the 36gallon honestly.. Wish I did. We have a faux (fake/not used) living room, but it'd be pointless to have a tank in there. No one would see it!


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## metricliman (Sep 3, 2012)

Then just pretend the tank has a leak.


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## DJRansome (Oct 29, 2005)

Hopefully she also has a hobby. Make sure she spends more on her hobby than you spend on yours.

If it's more a question of including a tank in main living areas from a decor perspective, find another place to keep your tanks. I use half of a basement room.


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## aicardi (Sep 15, 2012)

I don't ask.


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## DJRansome (Oct 29, 2005)

By the way, you don't want a tank (especially a 55G or larger) on a piece of furniture not designed to support the frame. The frame of the tank stand needs to be _directly under the frame of the tank...made to fit as it were._

The furniture can be ten times heavier than the tank stand, but it's the positioning of the frame underneath that makes it safe, both for your tank and for your carpet.


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## Andynater (Sep 23, 2012)

Better to ask for forgiveness then beg for permission!


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## aicardi (Sep 15, 2012)

Andynater said:


> Better to ask for forgiveness then beg for permission!


+1


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## smitty814 (Sep 27, 2012)

Going to a 55 is'nt that much of a leap. Better for the fish. More volume etc. Aquascaping I think is easier. Just don't say anything about the need for a larger filtration system. opcorn:


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## hampton (Oct 18, 2011)

Just buy it, I bought a 75 today didn't ask. So know I will have a 125 and 75 in the living room . She will get use to it


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## mhertzfeld (May 19, 2012)

DJRansome said:


> By the way, you don't want a tank (especially a 55G or larger) on a piece of furniture not designed to support the frame. The frame of the tank stand needs to be _directly under the frame of the tank...made to fit as it were._
> 
> The furniture can be ten times heavier than the tank stand, but it's the positioning of the frame underneath that makes it safe, both for your tank and for your carpet.


Yes, and if you have the money to spend you can get a nice stand and canopy that will really make the room look good. Which I'm sure your better half would apperciate. I'm a big fan of the Monterey furniture made by marineland. Oh and if your gonna do it you might as well look at a 75 or larger. If your like me a 55 won't be enough for you for very long. I started out with a 55, then added a 65 and most recently a 125. Wish I would have just got a 125 to start with then I wouldn't have so many **** tanks to clean.


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## Alleycat (Dec 2, 2006)

mhertzfeld said:


> I'm a big fan of the Monterey furniture made by marineland.


+1 :thumb:



mhertzfeld said:


> Oh and if your gonna do it you might as well look at a 75 or larger.


+1 again :thumb:

If it's an attractive piece of furniture it's much easier to present it to her/him than a make shift stand in an odd location. 
As for how to convince her you need this tank, talk about it ...ALL the time! Talk about fish continuously, talk about this website and what folks say or quote, draw pictures of what your "fishroom" may one day look like... 
I've found that springing it on her or surprising her with "look what I got today" can set you back years. Talk about it... until she can take it no more and says, "please, Pleeeeeeeease go get that tank !!!


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## halffrozen (Sep 24, 2011)

I find it is best to just get the tank.. let them be mad.. man up, and take the heat for a few hours/days/weeks/months/years. 

My wife usually like to work the "angryness" out with.... hmm.. how should I say this... "exercise"


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## aicardi (Sep 15, 2012)

halffrozen said:


> I find it is best to just get the tank.. let them be mad.. man up, and take the heat for a few hours/days/weeks/months/years.
> 
> My wife usually like to work the "angryness" out with.... hmm.. how should I say this... "exercise"


I love the "man up" part!
Luckily my wife loves aquariums. However she is not too fond of the aggression in the Cichlid tanks, especially the Jewel tank.


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## ShortBus (Aug 17, 2005)

I always ask her what looks better, which fish she likes the best, I tend to take her window shopping at the LFS to let her see the prices of the tanks, and them pick them up used so she sees how much WE saved.


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## nodima (Oct 3, 2002)

halffrozen said:


> I find it is best to just get the tank.. let them be mad.. man up, and take the heat for a few hours/days/weeks/months/years.
> 
> My wife usually like to work the "angryness" out with.... hmm.. how should I say this... "exercise"


As long as you are also involved in the "exercise" that is probably a good thing!


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## halffrozen (Sep 24, 2011)

nodima said:


> halffrozen said:
> 
> 
> > I find it is best to just get the tank.. let them be mad.. man up, and take the heat for a few hours/days/weeks/months/years.
> ...


It is fantastic.

:lol:


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## fmueller (Jan 11, 2004)

Here in Ohio I started with a 29G. Then I began building a 750G plywood tank, which send my wife into a panic. In the end we compromised on a 240G glass tank in the living room. A typical win-win situation


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## kmuda (Nov 27, 2009)

I have tanks in every downstairs room in my house, except the kitchen, with some rooms having multiple tanks (3 in the living room). While I don't necessarily fight the "bigger tank" battle. I do fight the "another tank" battle on occasion. I have a garage full of spares ready to bring up whenever a fish catches my fancy. or a breeding pair develops (SA Cichlids). My method...... When she catches me bringing another tank in the house and complains, I tell her "I could always go back to drinking as a hobby." :lol:

BTW... This last October was our 28th anniversary. So that line has been working for a while. :thumb:


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## TheFisherOfCichlids1 (Dec 19, 2012)

Get a 46 gallon bow front that looks exactely the same as your 36 it is just 6in longer than a 36 gallon bow she won't notice at all


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